Friday, November 30, 2012

Stepping Up

Finally the week is coming to an end! I mentioned before about the trade show for work, not only was it my first, but it was the 2nd biggest show that my company attends. It was so busy the first day, and I will admit I was nervous, I was kind of thrown in because trade show coordinator had to take emergency leave. There were other people there that had done the show before, but they were laid back. I stepped in and was the point of contact between her and the managers/reps at the show. She was really helpful in telling me what to expect, and I managed to take care of things as needed. I just really wanted to prove myself to the company and not screw up. As the days went on (it was a 4 day show), things got easier. It just felt good to be there talking about our products and interacting with our customers face to face. Working with some of our sales reps also gave me a chance to see how they work, and it was good to finally get to know them, even for only a few days.

While I thought I did an acceptable job, I felt like I could have done better. I will admit that the lackadaisical attitude of some of the managers and reps made me slack off a little bit. BUT our GM spoke to me and said he received a lot of good feedback about how I was working and conversing with the customers. A few people mentioned to me that I was doing a really great job and it felt amazing to hear that they thought I was a superstar. LOL I'm not going to let that get to my head though, no time for ego tripping! In any case, I managed to prove to them that I'm not incompetent like some of the other people they've had to deal with. Now I hope this works in my favor for them to make this permanent. Time will tell, but it looks good. :)

But even more importantly, I showed myself that I could handle it. I stepped outside my comfort zone and did it by myself. I learned to put on my big girl boots and handled my shit! And I explored something new that I actually enjoyed doing, so who knows, maybe this could be my calling..

-L


Saturday, November 24, 2012

Quick Holiday Note

Hey guys and gals. This is just a quick note to say that I hope your Thanksgivings went well. We all know we should be giving thanks everyday and not just this one day out of the year. I hope that you all tell your children what really happened on Thanksgiving, and not just the Disney version (when they are of appropriate age of course!) I also hope none of you killed yourselves on Black Friday, or for the rest of the weekend with crazy shopping. I have stayed out of all the stores, and done all my shopping online. Please remember today is Small Business Saturday and support the local businesses! They all need help, especially during this time after Sandy. Don't be greedy and don't forget those still in need. Giving Tuesday is right after Cyber Monday, so lend a helping hand if you can!

I'll be busy for the next few days. Big trade show for work. Setting up today and will be working it until Wed. This is my first time and the girl that would normally work it is unable to attend this year. So I will not have her guidance. Hopefully it all goes well. I probably won't have the time to post until its all over, but I will try!

Sorry if this sounded Hallmark-y...
-L

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

No respect

***DISCLAIMER - this is MY blog and I'm discussing MY feelings/thoughts. DON'T come on here and leave negative feedback trying to bash me. You don't like what you're reading, hit the 'x' and keep it moving. I'm not racist either, I love and accept everyone for who they are.***

This is a small add on to what I was mentioning in my previous post, about being treated differently in certain neighborhoods. People are always testing me and trying my patience. Most of you who know me, know my attitude is the worst - and that's on a good day. Usually I don't have one unless you start with me first. I try to mind my own business. I was on the train last night and it's crowded, rush hour, and this chic kicks and steps on me. I look up to see if she would say excuse me or apologize, I didn't have headphones on and neither did she. Nope. All she did was stare me down like I was wrong and posed up on the pole. Fine I'm gonna let it go, people are ignorant, whatever. I rolled my eyes and counted down to calm myself. Let her stare me down if she wants to, I didn't do anything to her! But a group of loud chicks come on the train invading her space and she just sits there quiet with her face screwed up, looking the other way. I'm getting off the train and walking up the stairs, and the same chic comes and rushes behind me, knocking into me hard with her bag. Again I look at her to see if she would say anything. Nope just stares me down, grilling me - almost like she wants me to say something. I just rolled my eyes and shook my head. "She's not worth it" I tell myself and keep it moving. I still see her out the corner if my eye walking behind me, but I just walk up and go about my business.

Now I said all if this without mentioning race. Can you tell me what race this individual was? It really only happens with one racial group anyway. Also, usually only with kids or people around my age group. I mean I'm 25, but depending on how I dress, I can look younger. But still most of the time you can tell I'm not in high school. Yet this type of thing happens to me all the time. I'm almost positive that if I looked more Jamaican or Trini that it wouldn't happen as often. People in certain neighborhoods more often than not will try to mess with me and it's like c'mon, why are you even doing it anyway? What do you have to prove? Even when I go to Jamaican restaurants, I make the Mr order for me because they won't even pay attention to me when I walk in. We both look Hispanic, but he has the accent that suddenly changes how they act. But me, with no accent at all, I barely get to put in my order.

Now even though Golden Krust is not a real Jamaican restaurant to most people, they still have Jamaicans working there. I go in from time to time when I'm in a pinch for food, and I'm always getting played. It was about 2 Saturdays ago (when I went to donate blood) and I walked into Golden Krust to get some porridge before I got in the train. I'm there and it's fairly empty, 1 person in front of me, few people sitting. I get to the counter and the lady had walked away to talk to someone working in the back. I'm standing there for a few minutes before she walks up to ask me what I want to order, when this guy walks up behind me and starts talking to her over me. They're speaking with the Jamaican accent over me like I'm not even there. I copped a 'tude with her and she mumbled something under her breath and rushed me out. Most of the times I notice the level of service I get compared to "fellow Jamaicans." I'm often given lackluster service, not even a hello/good morning etc even when I greet them nicely. But let someone walk in with an accent and their whole demeanor changes. I'm really about to just boycott Golden Krust though. The food is not even worth it.

I'm saying all of this here, because it's my blog and personal space to do so and I can be more open about it. When I write about them on FB though, people have issues. And yes I don't write my statuses in the most PC way, but it's what I see. I'm not writing "Fuck these n*****s I don't like them." That would be some racist shit. I write about dumb things I see on the bus/train that make me upset because they're portraying stereotypes that are on tv/movies/media. Or doing something that everyone else is looking at them for because they know its so wrong and they're embarrassed by it. But I'm always wrong for saying anything about it or even ringing it up because I'm not black or black enough to people. I'm called racist and told that I don't like black people. But it's ok for you to say it because you have the complexion to back it? I've see it on my social media sites plenty of times. I say one thing and I'm put down for saying it and people are offended, but then someone else will say the same thing I said and it's ok because they have more color on them. I have learned to stop putting things out there on social media, I'm not a compete twit. I get it. People will always have something to say. There's so much I can say about this particular topic, but I won't. I'm ending it here.

Remember my disclaimer before you say anything in the comment box. I approve them before they're posted.

- L

Monday, November 19, 2012

Green Mountain Wellness Collection



I received this free through BzzAgent to review, and I'm glad they chose me for this campaign. :) For those of you that don't know, I am an avid coffee drinker and I cannot go a day without my daily fix. I'm also really picky about the coffee I drink, so I was surprised when I enjoyed the Green Mountain Wellness Collection! They have 2 to choose from: antioxidant blend or focus blend, and they're both a nice medium roast. That was a bonus for me, I don't like coffee that's too strong or too weak. To give you a better idea, SB Pike or Breakfast Blend are my usual go-to choices when I'm at work, but I much prefer flavored coffees. I love the ish outta DD Pumpkin! But I digress. Green Mountain's Wellness Collection antioxidant blend is amazing for me. Great taste, plus benefits?? I was sold when I took my first sip. We all know how good vitamins are for us, and the antioxidant blend has Vitamins C & E in it. Makes me feel better knowing I'm getting this out of my coffee. One less thing for me to add to my diet! I'm all for shortcuts.

Now the focus blend from Green Mountain, that made a difference. It has 50mg of L-Theanine for as it says, focus. I popped the K cup in, added me usual creamer and sugar, just like regular. And I can't say for sure, but I did notice a slight difference. I certainly didn't feel as tired! Same great taste.

Check out my FB page for the link to the coupon!

xx
-L

*** I was sent these K cups for free to review, I was NOT PAID for my review ***

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Race Issue?

***This is a jumbled post. I will at some point edit this more. It has taken me over a month to put this enough together to post.***

It's always a race issue. Especially where I'm concerned. I'm tired of people telling me what I am and what I'm not. First off I'm of mixed heritage, secondly, does it really matter? I identify with all my family's cultures, and I was brought up with the knowledge of them. So let me clear it up right now.

My parents before I was even thought about.

My mom is Chinese and Jamaican. Her mother is Chinese Jamaican and her father is Chinese - he came to Jamaica from China. My father is Indian Trinidadian. I can't give the specifics on his side because I don't speak to him, and for awhile I didn't know who he was. But that's another story all in its own. I was raised by my mother and grandmother. So I grew up well versed in the Jamaican and Chinese cultures. It wasn't until I was older that I learned about the Trini side. I do identify more strongly with my Chinese and Jamaican roots, but I embrace all of them.

Grandma, her mom and her kids

Grandma (my mom's side) and some of my uncles and aunt.

I hate it when people ask me what I am, and then tell me it doesn't mean anything because I wasn't born there. If anything, I tell most people I'm American. I'm never black enough, Indian enough or Chinese enough to be accepted by the various cultures. Throughout my high school years I spoke to different groups and cliques, but I really didn't belong anywhere. When all else failed I just hung out with the Latinas. Why not? I looked like one. For the most part I just pretend to fit in, knowing damn well I didn't really.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not going through an identity crisis. Far from it. It's the rest of the world who has issues with who I am. And I'm tired of it. I'm always judged by the way I look, especially when I'm in certain neighborhoods with a specific demographic. I always feel like I'm being judged too. When I'm hanging with the Caribbean or African American folks, it's always about me being too American, not knowing enough about my cultures and not having the accent. Not knowing about the hair, or all the struggles they have gone through. With the Indians, I'm not Hindu or Muslim, so I don't subscribe to the same beliefs, know enough about the food, or the clothes. Chinese people don't even count me as "one of them." I always speak too "white" and am told that I'm trying too hard to be better than everyone else. No I'm not.

It's like I can't just be myself and have people understand or appreciate that. It's complicated. But I know who I am and what I believe. At this point I'm just ignoring what everyone says. I am who I am, get over it.

-L

Monday, November 12, 2012

Cover Yo Mouth!

I have many pet peeves, and this is just one of the biggest ones for me. People that don't cover their mouth when they yawn. It kills me. I don't want to see all in your mouth when you yawn and you wide open. That's nasty. Didn't your momma teach you any better? I see it everywhere - at work, the bus, the train, on the street, even people I know do it. I'm always like ummm ok.. Gross! Besides you never know what could fly up in there when you sucking up air. LOL I don't know about y'all, but it's an automatic reaction for me to cover my mouth. I mean my mom sho 'nuf would pop me in the back of my head if I didn't do that. Even if I have things in my hands I make the effort to cover my mouth, even if I have to turn my face into my shoulder.

Anyway I know I've been slacking on my posts, but I'm finally back in the office! Once I settle in, I'll be back on schedule. I'm pretty sure they'll be more pet peeves posted, as I have quite a list. Let me know some of your pet peeves, or tell me I'm bugging.

Til next time,
L

Sunday, November 4, 2012

November?

November is here. It kind of snuck up on me out of nowhere. With the storm that rolled through, it just pushed Halloween right out of the picture and brought November in the back door. This past week was ok enough for me, and I am so thankful for that. It has not been as nice to so many people and it hurts that I am unable to help the way I want to. I will make my monetary donations once my check comes. (I am actually waiting on a physical paper check to arrive in the mail. Who knows how long that will take with all this other craziness going on.) But I am still affected by the power outages and messed up trains. My office building was down for the count last week, and I finally received word that it is back up on power for tomorrow. However, we will not have heat. The trains are also not 100% back to normal and I hope that they will be by the morning. As they stand now, I will be taking the bus and 3 trains to get downtown instead of my normal bus and train. Still it is better than nothing and I am more than relieved to be heading back to work. Lord knows I need to get back to it. I was already trying to recover from those 2 days I took off for my birthday, now I have to recover from a week not working. Things are going to be tight for the next few weeks. :-/

Aside from all of that, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Things may start to look up for us. Fingers crossed.

Hope you are all doing well, and please stay safe out there.

-L