Thursday, June 20, 2013

Confession: I'm a Shopaholic

And I can't seem to stop. I need a serious intervention. I swear I was doing so well, I was saving and paying bills and then I snapped. It's funny that the less money I made, the better I was doing. Now that I have a salary and I know the money is steady....... It's a different story. I try to rationalize it by saying that if I managed to make it work on such little income before, I have more than enough money to buy what I want. I went long enough without spending on myself that I went batshit crazy. And I just realized how much I screwed up when I looked at my credit card statement. It's time to reign myself in, but I don't think I can do it. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not neglecting my bills or household duties, but I am neglecting my savings. I have a small rainy day fund, but it won't last too long if I don't keep adding to it. I'm trying to figure out what I spent all my money on and I can't put it on anything tangible. I have so much stuff that I don't need, don't and won't ever wear/use. It's ridiculous. I bought all these shoes, for what? I still only wear the same 3 pairs everyday. I don't wear heels because of my ankle, but I bought some anyway. I said I was over sneakers, but I got those Reebok classics and some Keds anyway. That at home gel kit I bought? Used it 3 times and it's sitting there. I have a drawer full of makeup I don't wear, nail polish I don't use, and countless beauty products I haven't even touched.

But I can't get rid of it. What if I need it in the future? I got rid of so many things in the past that I regretted not keeping. What if I get rid of those hot pink cork heels and then there's some event I need them for? They were only $20, so it's not worth getting rid of. Or those Vince Camuto flats that hurt my feet, but they were on sale. I can't get rid of those. I come up with so many excuses to not give/throw things away. It's also bad because let's keep it 100, this is New York City and even in the other boroughs (since NYC somehow is always synonymous with Manhattan) the apartments are small. I don't live alone either, so I feel terrible that all my stuff is taking over and eating up his share of the space. He hasn't said anything about it, but I know its getting bad. 

In the name of saving money and space, I will join Shopaholics Anonymous. And cut up my credit cards in the process. I have come too far to fall behind.

Anyone else coming to the meetings with me?

- L

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